My mom was worried that I was being too vocal about my uterus and the pains it gives me. I was trying (inadequately) to describe the hilarity of my uterus post and she obviously failed to see the genius of my observations. She lowered her brows and gave me that "concerned parent" look and asked quite intently, "Why are you talking about your uterus? On the internet?" I told her she missed the point (the point being I'm hilarious) but she would not follow.
I must carry on without her.
A couple days ago I got this Nexplanon thing put in my arm. After *le horreur* of the Nuvaring I'm strictly off lab-manufactured estrogen. That left me with a swelling 2 options, and the Nex looked like the best because I don't have to take it as a pill. The doc made a little incision and slid a plastic little toothpick thing up my arm that should *hopefully* make me pain and baby free for the next three years. Hey! What a bargain!
The Nex did give me a bruise (tis true, my beauteous flesh is temporarily tainted with the foul splotching of broken blood vessels). It was also hard to use my left arm the day after. But fret not. I am on the mend. At work I was supposed to be doing a great deal of typing and such but my left arm was being a baby and didn't want to work anymore. Actually all of me didn't want to work anymore, but I had agreed I would do all this typing in exchange for money that would allow me to buy some really great camera bag. So I had to stay, typing.
I thought it would be better to make my coworker aware of the condition of my fragile left arm. So I proceeded to tell him that I got the Nex put in, and he was all "Oh, yeah. Ok." But it wasn't enough of a reaction. I wanted him to at least widen his eyes at the sight of my gorgeous limb all battered and bruised.
So I proceeded to explain WHY I opted to have a plastic toothpick thing inserted under my skin. I used phrases like "killer uterus" and "felt like labor" and "pregnancy is gonna suck". It took me a moment to discern his shifty stance and his sweaty brow. As soon as I paused for breath he jumped right in almost in panic, "Yeah! Well, we still got... Here, why don't you go order the CD's in person??? Yeah, It's kind of a drive, but it's alright. You can grab lunch on your way back."
It was only coming back from lunch that I realized there may have been a boundary I crossed. I could just picture my mom's "concerned parent" look and suddenly felt that maybe the uterus isn't something you should talk about with your unmarried, male coworkers.
But I shrugged it off and finished my sandwich.
PS Thus far the Nex is great! Not even a headache. I'll let my coworker know first thing in the morning.
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